Sunday, July 17, 2005

These Songs Can Turn You Gay (guess i'm over the sandra tragedy)

read the following from the Weekly World News and let me know if you think they forgot any songs.

PSYCHOLOGISTS nationwide are reporting a disturbing trend among new, formerly heterosexual, patients -- they heard specific songs that apparently turned them gay. And the more times they hear these songs, the gayer they become. The tunes mentioned most frequently as being responsible for such gay brainwashing include:
YMCA, In the Navy, or Macho Man -- The Village People
I'm Coming Out --DianaRoss
ConstantCraving -- k.d. lang
Outside -- George Michael
Over the Rainbow -- Judy Garland
I'm Too Sexy -- Right Said Fred
I Will Survive -- Gloria Gaynor
Saturday Night Fever -- and anything else by the Bee Gees
Dancing Queen -- Abba
It's Raining Men -- The Weather Girls
Supermodel -- RuPaul
Believe -- Cher
Love to Love You -- Donna Summer
Vogue -- Madonna
Relax -- Frankie Goes to Hollywood
I Will Always Love You -- Whitney Huston
That's the Way I Like It -- KC and the Sunshine Band
Wake Me Up Before You Go Go -- Wham
I'm So Excited -- Pointer Sisters

Psychologist Dr. Todd Snider, author of the upcoming book, Don't Let Music Turn You Gay, recommends that if any of these songs start playing, "Turn them off immediately, leave the room, and start listening to any music by Ted Nugent, Ozzy Osbourne, Van Halen or Frank Sinatra. If it's too late, check into the nearest hospital emergency room as soon as possible."

3 comments:

airplanejayne said...

funny....I always heard that the song, "Turn your love around" by George Benson could turn ya' gay....


:-)

airplanejayne said...

--but it's so hot outside, that I wish it WAS--
Raining Men!!!!

APj

scarysquirrelman said...

huh...no songs by barbra streisand, beloved chanteuse of all gay men (or so i hear). guess she's just a memory.