Friday, August 04, 2006

Fuck You Friday #4

Stepped on my cat's foot last night. So, it was the big Fuck You ScarySquirrelMan! Yeesh, what a bitch.

Happy Fuck You Friday to y'all. Go here to find the creators of this sordid little weekly affair: Tequila Girl.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Finger Food? HNT

so, last week i think i showed a naked shoulder and wondered to myself what could be too naked about it. well, this would be it:

that's my new tat and i am so fucking stoked about it i want to shag all of you one by one by one and then by twos.
however, something happened in between the tat and tonight that truly disturbed me and made me question my inherently heterosexual sexuality. despite the beefy tat and manly arm holding that manly ink, something was, well, um, lacking. it wasn't so much that a yearning overtook me for no reason. what actually happened was a "present" fell into my lap, so to speak. a certain friend of mine forgot to take his hat with him one night when he suddenly jumped up and left the bar. for no apparant reason. for no discernable reason. no je ne se qois that i know. jump and run.
so, we looked at his hat. we looked at each other. we looked at his hat. we looked at each other. we looked at his bar tab. we looked the other way. we casually exited the bar . i ended up with the "Hat". i took it home. i made sweet love to it. i kissed it goodnight. i slept well for the first time in a month. when i awoke i made sweet love to it again. then i cooked it pancakes. then it bade me goodbye and disappeared. i thought i would make it through and live with the memory of that hat clutched between my tight toes. it never came back and i am left with that memory. and only that. i am not resentful or bitter. but i can't help but wonder what might have been

if i'd made waffles instead.

happy hnt, y'all.

This Is Dedicated To The One I Love: Steph.

Rumsfeld = Asshole. Too busy? Doing what, may I ask? Commiting more troops to cover a royally blown foreign policy? Spinning damage control throughout the Mid-East? Stumping for political candidates who feel too closely tied to this administration and its myopic idealogies? Meeting with Swiftboat morons who are now attacking Sen. Murtha?
And College Republicans are now actively campaigning for "Say It Ain't So" Joe Lieberman who has thrown off his sheep's clothing. Of course, when the GOP is willing to fund a Green Party candidate to run against a Democrat and a Reublican I shouldn't be surprised, especially when the Republican involved is Rick "Man on Dog" Santorum. Rick, you may remember, is the man who suggested that if homosexual marriage was legalized, then we would have to legalize bestiality as well.
And in Kansas, it's Evolution 1, Creationism 0. Of course, this score is subject to change. And rest assured that no one will ever score more than 1 point. They'll just keeping handing it back and forth. Me, however, I think of the question:
Which is more true?
A) Without us, God would not exist.
B) Without God, we would not exist.
If you think A is more correct, then you should be pushing for religion in all aspects of public life in order to bolster your "theory". If you think B is more true, then it really shouldn't matter one way or the other. In fact, I think keeping "Him" low-key would further bolster the argument that religion is only for the faithful.
This is sweet. Roy Blunt says he will not allow any meaningful forward movement on global warming so long as he is in charge. nice. Not until he has more info on whether or not it might be truer than what just about every fucking scientist in the entire galaxy is saying. Yep, best to remain skeptical up until the fuzzies on your eyelids burn off and you can't blink away the truth anymore.
So, what is it about Iraq and soccer that scares so many of those insurgents and terrorists. To date, national team members have all been threatened with death for wearing shorts in public (kind of hard to compete on the international level in oversized sarongs or bhurkas), the coach resigned because of death threats to him and his family, and now hidden bombs are blowing up children on playing fields. In this war for minds by both sides, no one is winning because only the extremists are calling the shots. Moderate voices are drowned out by the violent, executed by the insane, and called traitors by the traitors. How do the civilised on either side stand up and be heard without fear of attack?
Finally, this is too good not to share. The government has identified Exxonmobil, the New York Times, AP News Service, USA Today, PBS and Microsoft as small businesses. There's your Zen moment of the day.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

The Revolution Will Not Be Seen At This Time

well, kiddies, it seems that the great squirrel has been duped. scammed. snookered. hooked, lined and sinkered. taken to the proverbial cleaners.
there shall be no mars opposition as i had been told there would. it happens next year. and the "great mars opposition", which i had posted about earlier happened three years ago. see, what happened was someone found a reposted article on that opposition. the date on the repost was this year and, quite naturally, the reader didn't research further. neither did i until just now. so, no mars this year.
and those of you who attended a certain barbecue and were treated to a view of saturn's rings were luckier than you know. the rings' visibility will not be that good again until 2014. so, keep that memory intact.
however, jupiter is still cruising around the night sky and that is what i shall be taking aim at in the coming days. if i had more of an easterly view i would, also, shoot for uranus and neptune. alas, i'm hemmed in by redwood trees.
and there is a meteor shower approaching sometime this month, which is always worth a latenight blanketwatch.