Thursday, June 01, 2006

Bush will be publicly endorsing a constitutional amendment on Monday to ban gay people from getting hitched. This is not a winnable position in respect to actually getting such an amendment passed, but it is a good way to win back political clout with gene-challenged people: play on their paranoia and xenophobia. Personally, I like what Kinky Friedman had to say about marriage between gay folk: "they should have the right to be just as miserable as everyone else". Rumor has it that Bush will, also, propose an amendment that legalizes horsecock fondling so long as the First lady, I mean spouse, approves.
What a difference a failed war makes. The Dixie Chicks are back on top without an apology and with a new "single" that talks about being bashed for being honest. I put single in quotation marks, because country radio will still not play their music.
Rolling Stone gets it on with an article that hearkens back to what I was screaming about in 2004. To wit, the Republicans stole the fucking election. Again. This time around, Stone actually footnotes all of the allegations. To those of you who think I should take the tinfoil hat from off mein kopf, look around you and ask yourselves if this is the country you agreed to live in when you were 20. Ask yourselves if this is the country that your parents meant you to inherit. I know they didn't.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

now, it's not surprising that atrocities have been committed by our side in this conflict, just as they have been by the other sides (yes, that's plural, because there are multiple factions working against each other), and it's not surprising that it took so long for this specific atrocity to come to light, and it's not surprising that most of us don't seem to care as scandal-shocked as we are. so, the article is much the same as every other one we've read over the past week or so. but what i found interesting is the following clip from this particular article:
"More than two months after the incident Time magazine asked the military to respond to allegations of the killings.
The magazine says a Marine spokesman responded with an e-mail stating, "I cannot believe you're buying any of this. This falls into the same category of Al-Qaeda in Iraq propaganda."

so, what was this guy saying exactly? that al-quaeda is not in iraq? top officials (um, dick cheney) are still claiming that saddam had direct ties to al-quaeda and was harboring them before we invaded. so, is this guy in fact saying that dick's covered with shit? i mean, i DO feel like i've been inappropriately penetrated by the the dickmeister, but here's a spokesman for the marines telling time magazine that bystander-obliterating is about as believable as a bar-mitzmah in babylon. and he uses the al-quaeda link, which we've been repeatedly told to put in our hanky pockets since 2002, as an example. odd. especially since we know that al-quaeda is indeed in iraq now. unlike when we invaded.
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join the team, get your faith on and toss a dwarf for jesus.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

talk to the clown and toss that dwarf

well, i must admit i had a wonderful time tonight. apj has a great spread. and her house ain't so bad either. nyuk nyuk nyuk.
seriously, it was a fabulous barbecue. the food was great, the beer was aplenty, and the conversation never left the gutter. i will never look at a dwarf again without laughing. to myself, of course. because laughing at a dwarf out loud is really rude and inconsiderate. though, in terms of personal safety, it's not too dangerous. maybe some scarring on the knees or something, but that's about it.
and i will never ever talk to the clown again in public. i never knew it was considered socially unacceptable. even in a public restroom. or especially there. and all those times in the mall when i would talk to the clown and shake hands and tweak his little red nose...who knew i was breaking the law? well, maybe someday someone will go to manchester mall and dedicate a memorial plaque in my honor like they're thinking of doing for nick ryan and that toilet over at roeding park. or i'll get a street named in my honor like they might do for sam samuelian on motel drive.
i found the war nerd on wikipedia. this is the guy i've been trying to get you to read, because he claims to be from fresno. just too damn funny and acerbic for his own good. devastating reading. and you never do know what side he's shooting at.
speaking of shooting and not knowing who at, what's going on with the haditha massacre? it's beginning to look like we got ourselves a mini-mai lai on our hands. deaths aren't in the hundreds, just the dozens. but most of them appear to be executions of defenseless civilians in retaliation for a bombing attack they had nothing to do with. and the LA Times is pursuing another story in which a civilian may have been killed by marines and then set up to look like he was planting a roadside bomb. makes me think of the movie jarhead when the sniper team is about to get their first chance at a kill and the army breaks in and stops them, because a bombing raid will be so much more cooler. one sniper totally loses it, because he really wants this one chance to see the pink cloud. it's like these snipers have been so brainwashed and desensitized to killing that not getting to kill is the worst kind of emasculation. in the movie, though, they walk away and return to their unit to find out the war is over. in real life, the war is not over and it appears at the moment that soldiers may be under too much stress without proper command structure.
give a man a gun and he'll shoot the snot out of paper heads. teach that man to hate and he'll find moving targets.
and so bill frist has now said that the fbi's search and seizure within a congressman's office is within the law. a few days ago he was singing a different tune. but after meeting with alberto "VO5" gonzalez he's okay with it. why is it that when a republican disagrees with the bushies alberto "the consigliere" gonzalez seems to always have a sitdown with said dissenter and said dissenter almost always changes his mind? not that i'm against politicians not being above the same laws i'm required to obey. but (by the same token) ain't it funny that these politicians have spent 5 or 6 years letting the administration stomp all over our civil rights with nary a peep and suddenly, when one of their own gets the jackboot treatment, they are up in arms about it? both parties screaming about abuse of power and constitutional issues. i think i know where most of the pharmaceutical grade pot is being smoked now. when what they really need is a barium enema so that whenever they spew bullshit we can see the glowing vapor trail of it.
this is probably going to piss someone off (i hope), but i just have to ask: isn't the pope humanity's direct pipeline to god? isn't god supposed to speak directly through the pope? then why is the pope asking god why he didn't speak up or do something about the holocaust? is benedict telling us that john paul the 2nd (or whatever number) kept secrets? is he telling us that jp and the big g weren't really on speaking terms? the pope is on this earth to tell us what god is thinking and saying and doing and why. and here is benedict at auschwitz wondering what the hell god was doing right around the 1940's. personally, i think god was looking down (or up or sideways or whatever) and writing in his holy papers "note to Holy Self: germans and jews, that sucked.
p.s. further note to Holy Self: dissuade U.S. from creating land for anyone if it's not on U.S. soil. plus, ask Loki to kill all with the surnames Kennedy, Nixon and Bush. wait, strike Nixon. he amuses me."
so, cheney is still the vice-president, huh? good thing. but what's this little note about this administration challenging more laws than all previous administrations combined? wasn't it the bushies and their cohorts in congress who screamed bloody murder at the supreme court for "interpreting" the constitution when they should be laying down the law as writ (specifically during the terri schiavo non-crisis)? wasn't it the republicans who actually threatened the supreme court justices with the possibility of physical violence by "good (but misguided) americans" because of their twisting of the law? so, why is cheny still vice-president? lord knows no one will vote for him for president. we know and he knows. his heart will give out at any given moment. and his ties to big industry are just too, well, big to ignore. so, he's doing everything he can as the puppetmaster to make sure all of his ideas are implemented before 2008 rolls around. what we have to understand is that we have a second term group that smells death at the end of this term and is going to do all in its power to permanently change the balance of power. does it hope that another republican replaces it? yes. does it care deeply if a democrat steps in? not so much since it's burdened the next sucker with baggage that will stymie any reforms for decades to come. think about it. two "wars" not to be finished any time soon. social security no better than it was. a massive budget deficit. global warming issue not even approached. military brushfires around the world that weren't there 6 years ago (not to say they wouldn't have flared anyway). the ugly face of so-called religion having taken hold of politics one more time after a decade of tolerant acceptance by both camps. political scandals erupting everywhere. big business erupting everywhere and shitting hot lava on the common folk. tax breaks for the rich and half the usual tax return for me. mexicans who are suddenly the new face of terrorism and the reason our economy is in the tank. racism kicking up again. and not just from the crackers.
makes me want to curl up, watch movies and not leave the house ever again. damn java wava for making a killer avalanche.