Wednesday, April 11, 2007

F Bomb (Auld Lang Syne)

i don't like to crow. that's not me...normally. but there comes a time when i just can't keep it in. i gotta let it out. i gotta shout. i gotta strut and shake my stuff. jiggle the booty and shimmy the shake.

i'm going to see the san francisco giants play the new york yankees. did a bit of movin' and groovin', greasin' and wheelin' and shrimpin' the pimp if you know what i mean. yeah, you do. because you're sassy.

the freakin' giants are playing the fuckingyankees. to a diehard baseball fan this is nirvana. to a giants fan this is once in a lifetime plus peanuts. we've been waiting since 1962 to get another shot at those arrogant whale dorks.

and arrogant they are with the likes of derek fuckingjeter, alex fuckingrodriguez, bernie fuckingwilliams, hideki fuckingmatsui, johnny fuckingdamon, bobby fuckingabreu, andy fuckingpettite, doug fuckingmientkiewicz, jason fuckinggiambi, josh fuckingphelps, miguel fuckingcairo, robinson fuckingcano, kyle fuckingfarnsworth, carl fuckingpavano, mike fuckingmussina...and,uh, mariano fuckingrivera.

the fuckingyankees do one thing well above all others. they stack their roster with fuckingplayers. and by fuckingplayers i mean real ballfucking players. ballfucking players who are all very fuckinggood at what they fuckingdo. some of the time they fuckinggel and sometimes they fuckingdon't. derek fuckingjeter owns four fuckingworld series champion rings. and he started in fuckingall of them. mariano fuckingrivera has those same four rings. fuckingplus one or two MVPs.

george steinfuckingbrenner (owner) has a good fuckingfarm system that he treats like a trading fuckingstable. he cultivates fuckinggood talent, then trades it for a goodfucking deal. unless it is fuckingtoo popular on the block. then he keeps and fuckinggrooms it.

george steinfuckingbrenner, also, buys the bestfucking talent he can afford. every year. and since he has more fuckingmoney than any other owner he can buy the bestfucking talent. fuckingperiod. keep the fuckingones who produce each year after year and fuckingboot the ones who don't. with no fuckingfear.

so, i want to see in person my stinking giants kick the crapping crapcrap out of those damnitall yankees.


airplanejayne said...


ya' don't say?

Katie :) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Katie :) said...

Mr. Fishstick,

We at AT&T park do not accept that kind of language during games, and will if necessary send a very timid looking security guard to your general area of seating if you use it after being asked not to.
We ask that you please get it out of your system prior to visiting the park and the Godforsaken Yankees.


Mustang said...

Dear Mr. Limp Fish Dick...

In the immortal words of someone who's name I cannot remember, but who (being immortal) is not dead..

"Fuck the fucking fuckers!"


Generik said...

I am very fuckingmuch looking fuckingforward to this fuckingseries!

scarysquirrelman said...

thank you all for the words of fuckingsupport, but not one mention of this possibly setting a record for the most utterings of the f word in one post?